Just say no to rebound relationships when your heart hurts

It’s hard to tell when we are ready to start dating again or if we are on the verge of starting a rebound relationship.  

There are have been many debates about the benefits of rebound relationships and their ability to ease the recovery process of heartbreak, however, getting into a relationship for selfish reasons will not serve us or the other person. Dating is intended to interview for a spouse. If the heart is not healed and we are not mentally, emotionally, and physically ready we cannot give our heart to someone else.  

After a heartbreak our priority must be healing and learning to love who we are – we must rediscover our inner greatness and find happiness from within.  

The time it takes to heal is dependent on the length of our relationship, the amount of turmoil experienced during the relationship, and our ability to let go and move forward.  

There are millions of people that have found themselves in a rebound relationship and some have managed to successfully get over their Ex after hooking up with someone new. A large majority have said they feel stuck with someone they do not desire. Rebound relationships are typically short-lived – they last until someone gets tired of the other person.  

Dating someone for the wrong reasons can be damaging to us and the other person. When the relationship ends it will create emotional pain for our new partner and we will have to go through the painful healing process.  

Here are 6 Rebound Relationship Signs to Watch out for:

  • Dating because we just want someone 

     Sometimes we find ourselves getting into a relationship not because we are mentally and emotionally ready to, but because we are ready to have someone to call our own. When we rush the healing process and get into a relationship before our heart is truly ready to love we will soon discover what we thought was love – isn’t love at all.  

  • Dating someone because we don’t know how to get over our Ex  

Let’s face healing after heartbreak isn’t pretty. There are some days when we feel like we have everything under control and other days we feel like we’ve taken 1 million steps backward. On those really difficult days we may consider dating someone to get over our Ex. On the hurtful days it’s important to remember that dating someone before the heart is ready to love will position us for greater heartbreak shortly.  

  • We Frequently talk about our Ex to our new boyfriend 

It is normal to mention our Ex on occasion when having some conversations, however, our Ex should not be a frequent topic. Take some time to think about how often they come up in conversation. This will help determine out if our heart is ready to love again or if we simply need more time to heal.  

  • We fantasize about our Ex and getting them back  

When we going through the healing process it is common to think about our Ex from time to time. Frequently drifting off or going into a deep thought about an Ex is an indicator that they still have some presence in our life. Before we can invite another person into our life, we must first release our Ex from occupying our mental space. Dating should be delayed until our mind has been set free from our Ex.  

  • We still feel weak when we think about our Ex 

Heartbreak can take a few months or many years to heal. The journey varies from person to person and depends on how long we were in the relationship. The emotional trauma or damage experienced during the relationship, and if we are open to loving again. If we find that we are fearful or weak at the thought of our Ex. There is a good chance that we will require additional support and healing before getting back out there and starting to date again.  

  • When the thought of running back gets you excited  

Sometimes there is something within that just wishes the phone would ring and we could just make things better. If there is some inkling of hope that they will reach out to reconcile, dating should be postponed; as the heart still needs time too, heal.   

When we begin a relationship the thought of it ending never comes to mind. Heartbreak is difficult because we are forced to accept the thing, we’ve poured love and hope into has failed. Having a relationship fail gives us a feeling of rejection. So, it is natural to jump at the idea of having a new relationship, just to experience the emotions that come with being chosen. Healing the heart takes time and a little hard work, dedication, and commitment. Having patience with and releasing the pressure will allow us to break free and get on the road to healing so that we can become happy, healthy, and whole..... and ready to love again.   

 

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